daddy's girl

sailor did NOT sleep well the rest of the night, and was up at midnight with a fever. so i took her to urgent care this morning while jon watched sunny, and it turns out she has a double ear infection - her first. and it seems that i never really appreciated what a sunny soul she usually is, because now she is definitely NOT. she is fussy and impatient and difficult to please this morning, and doesn't want to eat or nurse or settle to anything. she wants her daddy mostly, which is par for her the last several weeks - she holds out her little arms to him when he walks through the room, and makes tiny waving motions with her hands - like she's saying, "to me! to me!" and if for some reason he doesn't stop to swoop her up, she cries - not moans, but actually cries real tears until he comes back to get her. geez. you'd think he was the lactating one.
but today is the worst, because he can't set her down for her wanting to be close to him. which is frustrating for me when i have to take her away to, say, try to nurse her! or pour pink medicine of a couple of kinds down her throat (and she's so squirmy, it goes down her neck, too, all over her clothes and mine- she's a much more difficult target than her brother ever was).
right now she's napping, so hopefully the healing process has begun. because honestly, i've grown spoiled by my undemanding second child, and i'm not sure how to cope with this sick creature who cries when you hold her and when you lay her down.
not that i'm unsympathetic. i know she feels rotten, and i'll snuggle her all she wants - but she's not a snuggler, really, so mainly she just cries and thrashes while i try to hold her. so i feel frustrated by her pain and by my inability to comfort. ugh.
and sunny doesn't like that she's crying so much. he's not used to it at all. last night he asked, "baby bonk-ed in her bed?" because of all of the wailing - sweet boy, that was the only reason he could think of, because really that's the only time sailor cries: when she falls down (which is more often than i'll admit here, now that she's pulling up and getting into things) and fusses and i run over and say, "aww, did you bonk?" so for him, bonking is the root of all crying. :) would that it were true!
ahh, but i'm making much of a small thing. in 24 hours or less the pink medicine will kick in, and my sweet girl will be herself again, and the world can stop revolving around her tears. (you know, though, she's awfully cute when she cries.)