peace

i was talking to a longtime friend today who has found her schedule to be a little out of control. she is older, with no husband or children, and is working four - FOUR - different jobs to support herself. she commented, "i just prayed for a little peace."

i told her that my schedule has seemed chaotic for, about, well, let's say the last five years, having multiple small children, multiple jobs, and a husband whose schedule is often as crazy as my own. and what i've continuously prayed for is peace.

and what i've learned - am learning, of course, it never never ends - is that peace without has very little to do with peace within. that as my outer life gets busier and busier, it becomes more and more imperative to seek peace from God, and to do it DURING the absolute craziness of external life. this, i'm convinced, is part of the secret of having real peace - to be so constantly and innately connected to God, receiving peace from Him, that even when Sailor inexplicably pees all over the living room floor for the second time that day, you can respond with calmness and compassion instead of frustration.

ok, let's be honest here. i responded with frustration.

(i guess that's why i need to continually pray for peace. :)